I remember fondly being a little boy. My mom would sit me in her lap, smile at me and say, "Your real parents hate you. They sold you to me for wine change. Now give your new mommy a hug and wax my back."
What I don't remember is who has the remote control for the LCD projector. But if you do use the remote control after the office closes, could you please leave the control in the Lillie Room in case somebody needs it the first thing the next morning? If you don't, it will be YOUR turn to wax my mommy's back. And her back makes Teen Wolf look like Yul Brenner.
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A compendium of emails received from our department secretary. Not for the faint of heart. Or the humorless.
Please note: all of these emails are real. They have been edited only to remove identifying information. If you find any offensive, take it up with his dudeness.
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