Various and sundry dudes--
If you come by looking for me tomorrow or Friday, Nov. 29-30, you won't find me. Oh, I'll be in my office. I just will be hiding under my desk trying to teach cockroaches how to reenact "Braveheart." Surprisingly, it hasn't been too hard teaching them to use those little swords and shields. It's trying to find horses small enough for them to impale that has me stumped.
Actually, I'll be visiting some family out of state. But I'll be back next Monday.
Adieu,
Dude
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Christmas gifts
Hey, everybody,
Well, Christmas is here, which can mean only one thing. It's time for my grandmother to make some fruitcake Depends for my grandfather. The structural integrity of Gram's fruitcake has been shoddy the last few years, though, so that means Gramps will have to go easy on the egg nog and crystal meth this Christmas.
It's also time to start collecting money to give to C, our cleaning lady, and J, the evening floor-cleaning dude. I was thinking of giving them their cards on Friday, Dec. 14. So if you'd like to give some money to make C's and J's holidays a little merrier, please bring your cash to me by the morning of Dec. 14. Remember, it would be much better to give these folks money than my grandmother's fruitcake.
Hohoho,
Dude
Well, Christmas is here, which can mean only one thing. It's time for my grandmother to make some fruitcake Depends for my grandfather. The structural integrity of Gram's fruitcake has been shoddy the last few years, though, so that means Gramps will have to go easy on the egg nog and crystal meth this Christmas.
It's also time to start collecting money to give to C, our cleaning lady, and J, the evening floor-cleaning dude. I was thinking of giving them their cards on Friday, Dec. 14. So if you'd like to give some money to make C's and J's holidays a little merrier, please bring your cash to me by the morning of Dec. 14. Remember, it would be much better to give these folks money than my grandmother's fruitcake.
Hohoho,
Dude
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
coffee pot
It is with great sadness that I must report one of our coffee pots is missing. This pot is more than just a container of coffee to me. It is my friend, confidant, and, yes, lover.
If you have seen the wee silver coffee pot, it would be groovy if you could let Dwight know so that we'll have it for next Monday's post-seminar social.
Stunned and hopeless,
Dude
If you have seen the wee silver coffee pot, it would be groovy if you could let Dwight know so that we'll have it for next Monday's post-seminar social.
Stunned and hopeless,
Dude
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Reimbursement requirement
Howdy, folks--
I just found out something about getting reimbursed for meals. If you take a zombie to lunch, human brains are not reimbursable. Yet oddly enough, entrails are. Go figure.
Actually, the comptroller's office is now requiring people to submit itemized receipts for meals. Usually you get a receipt that lists all the food ordered, and then you'll get just a receipt with the dollar amount if you pay with a credit card. From now on you'd need to turn in both the itemized receipt and the receipt that shows you paid for the meal.
Dude
I just found out something about getting reimbursed for meals. If you take a zombie to lunch, human brains are not reimbursable. Yet oddly enough, entrails are. Go figure.
Actually, the comptroller's office is now requiring people to submit itemized receipts for meals. Usually you get a receipt that lists all the food ordered, and then you'll get just a receipt with the dollar amount if you pay with a credit card. From now on you'd need to turn in both the itemized receipt and the receipt that shows you paid for the meal.
Dude
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
job search lunches
Hey, I have a question. How come you never hear about incestual necrophiliacs?
I have another questions. Has there been enough food for you folks at the faculty search luncheons? Should we be ordering more food for these lunches.
Dude
I have another questions. Has there been enough food for you folks at the faculty search luncheons? Should we be ordering more food for these lunches.
Dude
Sunday, November 04, 2007
Coffee Break
Hey, coffee lovers!
We have a special treat for you today. We will be serving coffee in the hollowed-out carcasses of dead voles.
Actually, there's already coffee and snacks up in the L Room, so if you want to start socializing a bit early, you can head to the room now and begin coffee breaking.
We have a special treat for you today. We will be serving coffee in the hollowed-out carcasses of dead voles.
Actually, there's already coffee and snacks up in the L Room, so if you want to start socializing a bit early, you can head to the room now and begin coffee breaking.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)